Tuesday, May 10, 2011

A New Day.... almost

So today started off the same as usual.  A 5am wake up call from a hungry little man. I feed him and go to lay back down as my husband is getting ready for work. Then I hear a faint reminder that we have house guests….
a little back story is needed here I guess….
A little over a year ago I was working for the Vampires of the USA (The American Red Cross), in their call center.  Worst job EVER. Finally on a Monday night I had enough and I walked out.  The next day I saw an ad in the paper for the job I currently have, applied, got an interview and started the next Monday. I am a community living assistant and med tech for Adults with Disabilities.  As rewarding and challenging as this job is, it has its ups and downs, but I love it, especially the place I’m in now. (Different story for a different time).
Anywho they have these “managers” for the houses. They take care of the schedule, doctors appointments, household budget and such for each house. They are grad students for the local college. There are two of them to each house, 7 houses in total. These managers live in the basements of these houses and take turns working shifts and doing the household duties they have. Last year I was working 40+ hours a week at two of these houses. A few weeks after I started was when a new “manager” started. (They do 2 year programs and every year one of them graduate and make way for a new “manager”)
This new manager (again another story for another time) and I because friends and had some interesting times. A few months ago she quit the house she worked in because the other “manager” is a bitch, infact so much that I also quit this house long before that because I couldn’t deal with her shit anymore.  Well about 3 months ago her father passed away in his sleep. Shocking and completely disrupted her life, and her families. She has two younger siblings, one of which still lives in PR with the mom and is in High School. So she made the decision to leave the states and go back “home” to PR and help out her mom til they can move back to the states.
So back to today…..
This friend stayed at my house last night, her and another house “manager” who is her bestie (who was taking her to the airport today), and her dog. Her annoying little mutt who decided at 5am, after I fed the baby, and snuggled back into bed to enjoy the 2.5 hours of sleep I could get before I had to get my daughter up for school, that he would bark. And keep barking. Then my friend decides to come get a shower, which right next to my room. So I hear her in the shower. She takes the dog in with her, so he doesn’t get into anything, and again barks. Finally it’s 7:30am and I have to get my daughter up for school.
So by now I’m awake but I want to sleep so bad, but now I can’t because they are leaving soon.  So now I have to stay awake. I have to say goodbye, but it doesn’t feel right. I have no emotion and neither does she.  Considering our past year, you would think different but nope. She leaves and I go back to sleep.
Work comes at 2:30. I love where I work, just sometimes don’t like who I work with. Some people are so lazy. Some people are just so used to doing nothing they don’t care that you do everything. These same people just love the drama. They love to see what they can get you to say so they can run and tell someone else. All evening I dealt with this. Young, stupid, ignorant, lazy, pain in my ass little girl! But I love my clients and I love most of my other co-workers. So I deal. I live thru it. It’s a new day, almost

Mothers Day

I guess it only fitting for my first post on this blog to be on the one day of the year where I would feel appreciated. The one day that you would think that the I would be allowed me time.
My day starts as any normal day, woken by my beautiful 3 month old baby boy @9am. I call out for my husband to come get the baby, because after all it is mother day and I should be able to sleep in a bit considering I was up all night with the baby. Funny my husband isn’t home. Could have sworn he went to the range yesterday bright and early. So I think, “MAYBE” he went to go get some breakfast or coffee or something. An hour passes by, still no husband and now my daughter is awake. Another hour, still no husband but a text…
Apparently he went to go help MY friend move somethings from her apartment to our house to store because she is moving out of the country for awhile. Apparently this takes 3+ hours.
So here I am in my lack of sleep state, already realizing today is just another day. Just another day for me to not have any time to do anything around the house because the baby needs somethings. Or I have to play super woman to everyone else around me. Drop everything and go to DH’s family’s house over an hour away because his mom said JUMP.
We don’t have much $ at the time, so I don’t expect much. A card is nice, but didn’t expect it because Birthday NO CARD/GIFT, Christmas NO CARD/GIFT, Easter NO CARD/NO GIFT, Birth of our Son NO CARD/GIFT, so why should mothers day be any different right? Well at least my 7 yr old daughter has enough sense to know that, so she secretly made me a card. It was soo sweet.
DH get into a few more fights today. One of which is where is likes to do this often, tell me how unimportant and low paying my job is, so why do I even bother. Belittle me and make me feel horrible. I work second shift, which is sucky hours, with only a High School Education, I’m sorry I can’t work a 9-5 making $20+ an hour. Someone has to stay home and take care of YOUR kids!
So here I sit at 1:30am the day after Mothers Day. Tired, and mentally exhausted. I can’t count how many times I’ve cried today. Empty handed and hearted. Thou as I type, listening to my little baby boy softly snore in my lap it almost make todays events ok. Make the fact that my right pinky is throbbing from being so upset I punched the closet door instead of my husbands smug face. Make it ok that I know I won’t get any sleep anytime soon. Makes it ok that I can hear my husband snoring from the other end of the house. Right
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